Friday, February 09, 2007

And the lesbians come marching in

The military policy of don't ask, don't tell seems to be paying off. Our leaders apparently forced the resignation of a number of homosexual foreign language experts, particularly those in Arabic. And here they are crying for qualified foreign speakers to risk their lives in an oil based war. If I was getting sent to Iraq, the claim of being gay would be a viable option. Every time I hear congressional members speak I wonder if they have any idea about what is truly going on. Perhaps Rep. Ackerman does. A platoon of lesbians to defeat Americans in Iraq? Well Nancy Grace is certainly doing a damaging enough job and she certainly looks like a dyke but certainly far less intelligent. Just send those platoons of lesbians to my door; I know exactly what to do with them. Quick get the camera and 300 cans of creamed corn.

Anyone else who has walked down the NYC streets with even a shred of self-awareness and intelligence realizes that about 3/4 of the city should more than likely be nuked to the banks of the River Styx. Yes chemical castration is a viable option for most of the population and should be considered freely. How many times have you handed a person enough money to get a fiver back and they hand you four 1's because they are unable to realize 4+1=5.
The lack of mathematical ability in this country is generally considered astounding. But it should come as no surprise, science and mathematics are not the realm of the white population. We're better at praying to the altar of image, theft and the lies of capitalism. Technological innovation was always better adapted to those who were not so concerned over which movie star ate what cinnamon roll for breakfast. Screw this, I'm moving to Micronesia.

DRM, the bane of digital music's existence has received two possibly devastating attacks. First Steve Jobs attacks the true nature of DRM and states that its existence is utterly pointless. Secondly it appears that EMI is considering dropping DRM from any of its online music libraries. Perhaps the recording industry has finally realized that the champions of online pirating security are nothing more than the internet equivalent of the Homeland Security department. Ignorance and red tape seems to dominate not only the government but every echelon of business existence. Further proof that chemical castration is a good answer.

Oh man, my conspiracy theorist best friend has been proven right. I knew that footage in Signs was real, M. Night Shamalyan you can't fool the yeti. Now if only Chile will admit that those peppers are genetically enhanced by hormone fed cow's shit. I need a glass of glowing green milk to wash all this down. Mmm, radioactivity grant me the powers of cream. Oh wait, maybe thats not such a good thing.